Realization

Brittany Calderon, Guest Contributer

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I still remember the day like it was yesterday. The sun was beaming into my room, the alarm clock was going off. “Another day of school” sighing as I rubbed my eyes but still feeling the heaviness in them. As I got up I pressed the alarm, shutting it off, I grabbed my white collared shirt and khaki pants. I quickly got dressed and grabbed my yellow and black checkered backpack, I headed to the front door hearing the click. The sun was shining and the trees were blooming, I could hear the laughter of students from the distance. I started walking which took about 5 minutes. Ding, the bell rang, I headed upstairs to my first class of the day and took my seat.“Welcome back kids, hope you had a good weekend, as you know you have homework due today so if you could take it out” Oh no, I felt the dread on my face. I had to think fast, what could I do to not get in trouble? The teacher was approaching me and with every step I felt my collar become tighter and tighter to the point where I had to unbutton the top one. “Brittany, do you have your homework?” I was shuffling through my bag acting like it was somewhere in there but truthfully I knew I had not done it. “I do, it’s just I can’t find it”, she raises her eyebrows “Well I will come back around”. I heard her footsteps become farther, now I just hope she forgets. I may have dodge it the others times but this time I felt the teachers glance at me constantly throughout the class today, she was helping other students and had not come back around. Ding, I stuffed my notebook and binder into my bag and closed it, unfortunately just as I half walking and half running out she said “Brittany can you come here”, I stop and slowly turn to face her. My heart beat faster, “Brittany this no homework has become a serious issue we have to call in your mother, and you have to attend as well” she paused and observed her calendar “How does today after school sound?” I knew I could not make up an excuse so I agreed.

The rest of the day I could not concentrate with all theses thoughts running through my head, How do I tell my mom she has to come to the school to see I was not doing my work? Would I get in trouble? Can I get out of this or was this my last straw? Could I have lied better and not be in this situation? I arrived home gripping my bag tightly, “Brittany, I received a call  from school”, I rub the back of my neck I noticed she was wearing her coat and had her purse in hand. “We have to go now” she said while opening the front door and I followed behind her. We entered and I took the lead walking to my teacher’s classroom, we arrived and she turned towards us waving her hand telling us to come in. She held her hand out towards the two seats placed in front of her desk, “It’s good to see you guys made it, I just want to go over with you what has been going on” she said while looking at my mom. She shuffles through some pagers “Here it is” she places it right in the center, “Okay so here you can see her grades from the beginning of the year to now and from here to here they have been great but now they are dropping due to not doing her homework” my mom nods “So she has not been doing her homework lately?” “No” my teachers says glancing at me. As I sit there and play with my fingers, constantly moving in my seat. I can feel my mom’s gaze at me, I should have just done my homework. They continued to talk but I felt like I was miles away. By the time I became refocused she was waving at us, on the way home my mom hand her arm over my shoulders and started laughing. I felt the need to laugh along making it awkward luckily though the brown two-floor house was not that far.

Once we arrived home I thought she was going to say I could not play outside for the rest of the week or something along these lines but she did not say anything. I watched her walk down the hall hearing her footsteps became softer. I was curious so I followed her and entered the room she was in. It was filled with her perfume scent. She was standing in front of the mirror applying makeup getting ready for work. “Sit down” she said, I sat on her bed that had the softest blanket over it, “Am I in trouble?” my heart felt like it stopped “No, I just want to tell you something” I still felt nervous thinking she was going to ground me. “So you know I grew up a different country right, and things are done differently there. When I was growing up there were 6 of us to feed and so we had to work outside everyday, my brothers had to work hard to earn little money barely enough to feed us all. I knew I had to do more for my family and so I started to go to school. I was the only one out of my sibling to attend school and at first my parents did not want me to go because they needed help at home but I was determined. So I got up everyday on my own and would return home to help out, I was going to become a teacher in el salvador but I came here. I did it because I wanted a better future for you guys and even if my dream was over there I wanted what is best for all of you and I did not want all of you to go through .” That was when it struck me that what I was doing was wrong. I felt disappointed in myself because I know I knew better and I could do my homework but my poor decision lead to me not doing it just because I did not want to. I remember feeling that school was not as important thinking it would not impact my life but I could not have been more wrong. School is impacting my future and I throughout the years it made me realize how truly important it is. She has truly changed me as a person from who I was then to who I am now, I am more focused and motivated to get my work done and to do to the best that I can. I want to strive for both my family and myself, I get up everyday to push forward because I know what I want. What I want is to give back to every single one of my family members because they were always there for me and without them I would not be able to. If it was not for my mom I might have took the wrong road and I am forever grateful that she was willing to give up her dream for ours.

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Realization